A healing visit to Munich!

Odeon Square

Before leaving France, I made a quick visit to Munich where I lived for more than 8 years. It certainly felt peculiar as I did not know what to expect from this trip. I moved to Germany for my studies when I was 18 and spent a good part of my 20s there. Life in Munich was not always easy. I struggled to find meaning and purpose. During that time, I also went through numerous family problems. Before attending a 10 day Vipassana Meditation retreat in Switzerland in 2006 (where I made up my mind to move to Australia), I was depressed and had no direction. Therefore, going back to Germany brought up many different emotions.       

One of my good old friends, Flo, picked me up from the airport and we went to his place in Gruenwald. I haven’t seen him for more than 8 years but we reconnected easily. Both of us had many interesting stories to tell. We visited one of his work places where he teaches Taekwondo to children. At night, I met his future wife, Moni, and we had dinner together. It was a great night.

Siegestor

The next morning, I started to walk on the familiar streets of Munich with memories flooding my mind. I paid a visit to another friend, Christian, whom I met in Sydney many years ago. He actually hired me as a bartender when I first moved to Australia. Now, he runs his own restaurant in Munich. After a good chat, I continued my journey towards the city centre, Marianplatz. When I was working as a tour guide in Munich, all of our tours started from there. Being at the same spot many years later brought up mixed emotions. I felt melancholy and joy at the same time. I acknowledged the past and realised the personal growth and change I went through.

I stopped by the office of my former tour company and visited my ex boss, Ralph. We had a quick chat as he was busy. In the afternoon, I strolled up to Max-Weber Plazt where I used to live. I met up with my Greek friend, Ari, who always encouraged my spiritual search through long discussions, and book recommendations from Osho. It was beautiful and very emotional to meet him, who helped me to start my spiritual journey and healing. We had a good chat about life and our experiences in the past 7 years before I moved on.          

Visiting Claudio

The next day, I went to see my salsa teacher, Claudio Pacheco. He is an amazing dancer, musician and a dear friend from Cuba. He taught me how to dance salsa and we used to spend a lot of time together before moving to Sydney. I was delighted to see him and his family after many years. 

The day continued by meeting some of my former colleagues, Jeff, Eric and Sabri in a traditional Bavarian restaurant. We had a couple of tasty local beers, talked about the good old times and had a blast. I still believe that Bavarian beer is the best in the world. I would like to offer special thanks to Sabri who provided most of the beautiful pictures in this episode. If you ever need a tour guide in Munich, you can contact him through Salut Munchen.

Munich, the capital of Bavaria (and beer) is close to epic Alp Mountains which offers incredible hiking experiences. There are also numerous lakes around this charming city where you can do day trips. My favourite ones are Tegernsee and Starnberger See. Another amazing site is the legendary Neuschwanstein Castle which is about 2 hours away from Munich. It is a 19th century Romanesque palace commissioned by King Ludwig II of Bavaria. It is visited by more than 1.3 million people every year and was the inspiration for Disneyland's Sleeping Beauty Castle. 

Fairy tail Castle of Neuschwanstein

In the next couple of days, I got to see with my adoptive parents, Hanife and Ali, and their relatives from the Turkish community, Sukru, Aysegul, Zehra, and many others. I appreciate their amazing hospitality, kindness and beautiful loving hearts. 

As the days went by, I got to spend some quality time with friends who played a major role in my life when I was going through challenging times. A big thank you dear Christina and Dani for their support and encouragement. Seeing them again helped me realise how much I have grown since I was there 7 years ago. I am very grateful for all the beautiful souls who crossed my path during my journey over those years.

7 days in Munich came with an incredible healing. I truly enjoyed seeing my old friends, spending time in this elegant city and was able to fully close an old and somewhat bitter chapter of my life. I now know that I needed to go back to release these old patterns and traumas, and acknowledge the change and growth within my soul.

I would like to finish this episode with a quote from my diary “Thank you for the good and the difficult times, thank you for the experiences, laughter, sadness, depression, pain, happiness, support, anxiety and worry. Many thanks to all my friends and family. I am now ready to release the old energy and move on to the new chapters in my journey. Namaste."

Bavarian Alps

C'est la vie: France!

After 6 wonderful weeks in Turkey, it was time to say that word again “goodbye”. This time it was harder than usual. Leaving my family behind without knowing when I will see them again was difficult but had to be done to embrace the wonders of the world.

Our flight left from Antalya to Paris. Alex and my in-laws, Jacqueline and Christian, helped me to deal with the melancholy of the situation. Antoine, a family friend, picked us up from the airport after a 3 hour flight. Being in Paris in summer was intriguing but the weather didn't look very promising with all the rain and cold at the time.  

La Seine

The first couple of days were spent to catch up with Alex's relatives and friends. Jacqueline and Christian hosted a couple of fantastic garden parties which provided a wonderful 
opportunity to reconnect with the extended family and friends. We were fortunate to taste different home-made French dishes accompanied with refined wines carefully picked by my father-in-law. Christian loves his wine and built a small wine cellar at home. We were wined and dined exquisitely. A big thank you to Jacqueline and Christian for their hospitality and love. 

A week after our arrival, my brother-in-law and his wife, Charly and Damaida, left for Cuba to continue their adventure. After lots of struggle in France, they moved to Cuba, where Damaida comes from, two years ago to start their own business. It has been challenging for them at the beginning but they seem to be happier with the Cuban lifestyle now.   

Lunch with the family

In Paris, we had to deal with annoying formalities of travelling such as organising flights, booking tours in Peru, and getting yellow fever shots. If you are planning to do the Inca trail which is a 4 day hike that ends in magnificent Machu Picchu, you need to reserve your spot 4 to 6 months in advance due its popularity. Dealing with such formalities is not fun but necessary to get the best deals in transport and organised tours. Thankfully, my wife is a graphic designer and is very efficient in online research as I am more of a go with the flow guy.

Of course, we spent some time visiting amazing treasures of the city of romance. Going to centre of Paris is always an adventure. Alex's parents live about 20 minutes away from the centre by train. The Parisian metro system is one of the oldest in the world and is always full. We experienced some unusual (mostly unpleasant) odours during our travels with the subway. Moreover, people, apart from the tourists, seem to be irritable and unhappy. They live in a beautiful but highly stressful environment. Parisians love to complain about everything including dramas in their lives, politics, traffic, love affairs etc. I felt like being in a soap opera when listening some of the conversations. Nevertheless, Paris is an incredible city that offers a vast variety of intriguing attractions to any tourists. 

Personally, I like Montmartre which is an area full of street artists and musicians. St. Michel has also lots of nice cafes and is a quite popular spot among locals and tourists. Of course, there is the Notre Dame, the Eiffel Tower, Versailles Palace and the Louvre that can’t be missed in this charming city of love. The romantic walks along the Seine River on a sunny day made me feel in a magical movie. Visiting the forest of Fontainebleau and the town of Barbizon, helped us to relax and get away from the hustle bustle of Paris for a while.

Streets of Montmartre

As you already know French cuisine is very refined. On top of eating great food at home, we ate out a couple of times. Make sure to check the menu first to avoid unpleasant surprises as some restaurants can be extremely pricey. My favourite restaurant in Paris is called Chez Maurice on the Rue des Vinaigriers. It is a restaurant from the Bourgogne region where the food is extraordinary. Baguette, cheese and wine are also a good option if you are travelling on a limited budget. I think France produces the best cheese in the world (more than 365 varieties of cheese!). Don’t hesitate to try some of the stinky ones when you are there.

Incredible Mont St.Michel

One of the highlights of our visit to France was a 2 day trip to Normandy and Brittany. We started with the outstanding Mont Saint-Michel which is an island commune in Normandy. It consists of a small village around a Gothic-style Benedictine abbey dedicated to the archangel St. Michael which was built between 11^th and 16^th centuries. Every 12 hours during low tide, you can enjoy a walk across the mud flats. I never thought walking in the mud would be that much fun! In high tide, the sea emerges at the speed of a galloping horse which is spectacular to watch. Here is a link to some pictures of this incredible place.

Mud walk

After a traditional crepe for lunch, we visited the well-known restaurant La Mere Poulard which is famous for its omelettes. I have to warn you that it is very touristy and the prices are extremely high.

We continued our trip toward Saint Malo, a small walled port city in Brittany. It is a major tourist attraction with impressive French architecture. This region is also famous for its ciders and crepes which which we enjoyed for dinner. It is a magical town with typical French flair.

After the breakfast, we made our way to back Normandy to visit a small town, Villers Sur Mere, where Christian used to spend summers during his childhood. The drive around the country side of northern France is spectacular. Every moment you can spot a nice little village with colourful flowers and traditional architecture. We stopped in a little community, Beuvron En Auge, which is classified as one of the most beautiful villages in France. 

Quiche, cider and traditional Normandy biscuits were on the lunch menu. Our trip on the countryside continued with Honfleur and Deauville villages before we reached Villers Sur Mere. Christian was happy to show us around which seemed to bring back some of his childhood memories. If you ever get a chance to drive around the countryside of France, do not hesitate. It is absolutely stunning.

A typical house in Beuvron En Auge

Discover Turkey!

Shopping with my cute niece

After 6 long weeks of separation, it was time again to reunite with my beautiful wife who spent most of her time with her family in Paris. We drove to Istanbul to pick her up just a day before my birthday. It was wonderful to see her again. During the same time period, my brother, his wife and my little niece, who live in the U.S. came to Turkey for holiday. I hadn't seen my adorable niece for more than 2 years and could not believe how much she had grown. It certainly was a family reunion. After spending one night in Istanbul, we drove back to Eskisehir for my birthday celebrations.

Family time

We arrived at one of my auntie’s house who prepared 15 different dishes. Wow, what a feast! There were lots of mezes, soup, main courses and desserts. At the end of this amazing dinner, I could not move from my chair for a while. I was definitely putting back on the kilos that I had lost in India. It was a wonderful to start my new age with all this love and food.

While we were in Eskisehir, Taksim Gezi Park protests started in Turkey. The initial protests were led by some environmentalists opposing the replacement of one of last parks in Istanbul with a shopping mall. The protests developed into riots all around Turkey against the government when a group occupying the park was attacked with tear gas and water cannons by the police. 

Alex at protests

Many of these events were peaceful until the police started to attack the protesters. Alex and I went to a couple of these demonstrations in Eskisehir, which did not have any violence. However, there were also very brutal riots in many cities. Unfortunately, 11 people lost their lives and around 8,000 people were injured. According to Amnesty International Turkish authorities committed human right violations on a massive scale in the government’s attempt to crush Gezi Park protests. It was very distressing to see the police violence towards innocent people who were simply using their democratic rights. I wish for a peaceful resolution of this conflict.

When our time came to an end in Eskisehir, we started to drive towards the south-west to discover the Aegean cost of Turkey before meeting my wife’s parents in Side. Our first stop was Pamukkale. It is a natural wonder which contains travertines (terraces of carbonate minerals left by the flowing hot springs). It is a spectacular place with great views which cannot be missed if you visit Turkey.

Beautiful Pamukkale

After spending the night in the coastal town of Marmaris, we continued to the next tourist attraction. Ephesus was an ancient Greek city on the coast of Ionia which was built during the 10^th century BC. It is situated in Selcuk, a small town located 30km away from Kusadasi. It is a magnificent site where we spent around 4 hours visiting some incredible ruins, striking temples and a colossal amphitheatre. The archaeological excavations are still continuing in this stunning historical site.

Magnificent Ephesus

Only 7 kilometres away from the incredible ruins of Ephesus, the House of the Virgin Mary welcomed us. This small shrine attracts many pilgrims based on the belief that Mary was taken to this stone house by Saint John and lived there until her death. This site has an incredible calming energy and we felt very Zen after our visit.   

Ruins of Amphitheatre in Ephesus

After some spectacular sightseeing, we drove to another coastal town called Oludeniz (official translation Blue Lagoon) which is very close Fethiye. This place became one of my favourite spots in Turkey. We checked into great hotel called Vento Boutique Hotel, a lovely little guest house that provides warm Turkish hospitality. It is an ideal place to relax and unwind. At night, we checked out Fethiye’s fish markets where you can select different variety of fish and eat at one of the local restaurants. Once again, we weren't disappointed with the food.

Fethiye Fish Markets

The next morning started early with a delicious breakfast at the hotel, followed by a peaceful swim in the crystal waters of Oludeniz. Around midday, we started driving towards Side where we would meet Alex’s parents that night.

Before reaching Side, we visited my uncle and his family in Antalya. It was terrific to see them again after many years. This trip became all about reconnecting with the family and I am very grateful for that. A major disadvantage of living in Australia is that we don’t get to see our family very often.

Alex and I don’t really like staying in resorts as it makes it hard to experience the culture of the country we are visiting. However, this time we were catching up with our extended family including my my in-laws, my brother and his family. The week at the Hotel Otium Eco Club Side turned out to be an unforgettable family holiday. 

This resort mostly caters for families with children. So, it was perfect for my little niece, Lara. Our days were filled up with swimming, tennis, beach volley, and water polo. The food in the open buffet was exquisite. At night, we watched exciting shows presented by different dance and acrobatic groups. I was also  happy to catch up with one of my friends, Murat, from the university years in Germany who now lives in Side. Many thanks to Murat to show us the dynamic night life of Side.

Mum's Birthday Party!

On our last night, my in-laws organised a surprise birthday party for my mother. It was a grand closure to our trip in Turkey. 

Most of my time in Turkey was spent to reconnect with the family and friends. I feel very fortunate to have such amazing people in my life. I did not always have good relations with my family but in the recent years, things have gotten much better. Family relations aren’t always easy to manage and they can be very challenging at times. You might even choose to emotionally cut off from your family like I did many years ago.

Emotionalcut-off describes the way which people manage their unresolved emotional issues with other family members by reducing or totally cutting off emotional contact with them. A cut-off can happen through physical distance or forms of emotional withdrawal. Although the immediate pressure might be relieved by cutting off, the patterns of reactivity in intense relationships continue to be the same (Brown, 1999). Therefore, these unresolved issues or the patterns of reactivity repeat themselves in new relationships (Richardson, 1995). 

My personal experience is that cutting off from family does not really solve any family problems. Through individual and group therapy over a long time, developing awareness and accepting who I am, I managed to reconnect with my family. It is continuous work which requires willingness, patience, forgiveness and love. You can’t change your family. You can only change yourself and through that everything around you changes. Put the effort in, you won’t regret it.

Last night in Otium

Back to the Roots: Turkey

After a long journey from Delhi, I arrived to Istanbul on the night of 3^rd of May 2013. It was wonderful to see my parents at the airport. I felt completely safe and happy surrounded by the love of my parents in the country I was born. My mother was shocked to see me so skinny after losing 4 kilos within 3 weeks in India. So, the next couple of days were spent recovering from infections and reconnecting with my family. It was wonderful to eat anything I wanted without being paranoid about getting sick. A big thank you to my mother and father for all the love, care and refined dishes they prepared for me.

My adorable nephew

After recovering my strength, I caught up with my cousin and her family in Istanbul. It was fantastic to see my adorable, 2 year old nephew for the first time. We enjoyed an incredible, traditional Turkish breakfast hosted by my cousin. I felt joyful and grateful to see them again after a long tine.

I also met up with a high school friend, Emre and his family. Although we don’t see each other often, we managed to stay in touch even after 18 long years. Also thanks to Facebook, I managed to was able to reconnect with two of my former students, Eda and Can, from Sydney.

Dinner with friends

4 days in Istanbul were enough for me. Personally, I don’t like metropolitan cities and Istanbul is the biggest city in Turkey with more than 15 million inhabitants. Although it is an amazing place to visit with all the historical sites, it can be very hectic, crowded, and tense. Some major tourist attractions in this lively city include Aya Sofya Museum, the Topkapi Palace, Blue Mosque, Galata Tower, the Grand Bazaar, Ortakoy, Taksim, the Basilica Cistern and of course a tour of the Bosporus. If you have more time, you can visit some of the nearby islands by ferry, especially Buyuk Ada (Big Island) is worth seeing. Here is a link to Istanbul city guide for more tips.

Despite all the wonderful sites and entertaining tourist attractions, Istanbul is not a place for me to live. The traffic is a nightmare and whenever I am there, I feel lost in a big bubble. Hence driving towards my hometown felt great! 

With Dad

We arrived in Eskisehir after 4 hours of drive. It is a much smaller but vibrant city (around 700,000 habitants) with lots of students, cafes, music, and cultural activities. It is a very liveable city and I still feel peaceful when I come back to here even after 18 years. Here is a nice article at Huffington Post about this beautiful city.

My days in Eskisehir were very relaxing. I spent a lot of time at home with my parents. It was wonderful to reconnect with them and share my journey. I also met up with some of my high school friends, Volkan, Derya, Tuba, Berkay, Bora and Alper. I am always grateful to see my old friends after many years.    

Some of my time was dedicated to improve my Spanish in preparation for our South America trip. I found BBC's free online course very effective and entertaining and can recommend it if you are planning to learn a new language. 

I visited my aunties and grandmother several times during my limited time there. My grandmother was 84 years old at the time and she had developed Alzheimer’s disease in the last few years. She was born in 1930 in Istanbul, had a very difficult childhood. Her parents had to migrate to Turkey from Skopje, Macedonia because of the increased political turmoil in the region. Her father died when she was three years old and her mother remarried a few years later. After primary school, she started to work in a tailor shop and dreamt of creating her own fashion business. However, she married my grandfather at a young age and could never realise her ambitions. 

When I saw her this time, she had lost a lot of weight and had problems with her memory. She looked very delicate and could hardly walk without help. She still knew who I was but seemed confused and detached most of the time. Sadness was the main emotion to see her in that state. We often seem to forget about the old age and death. Seeing my grandmother in that condition made me appreciate the limited time I have in this world. 

Life is to be experienced fully so that we don't have any regrets when we come towards the end of our journeys. Lets make the most of our precious time NOW!   

I spent as many memorable moments as I can with my grandmother without knowing if I would ever see her again. Unfortunately, I found out that she passed away 5 months later, when we were in Peru. I feel grateful to have seen her before she crossed over. May her soul find peace and serenity she did not have in her lifetime.   

With my dear grandmother